Kemmiiii's Blog

Posts Tagged ‘Future

In 10 years, I’ll be nearing my third decade in life. I want to have achieved a lot. A lot of things of which I’m not sure yet. I’d probably be a senior resident on my way to becoming a consultant. Yes it’s feasible. I definitely want to work in a hospital like LUTH But when I think about all the strikes, wage disputes and all, I begin to reconsider. But one thing is for sure, I’m not gonna go straight from med school into my father’s hospital. I have to first of all explore the world on my own.

On the home front, I’d probably be married to Le love of my life when he finally surfaces. We should have had our two kids – two beautiful kids- by then. Come to think of it, if I have two kids before I hit thirty, I may not make consultancy early. Has to be one for one. It’ll all fall I’m place. Somehow.

Anywho, I just want to lead a happy balanced life; seeing as life is too short to be anything but happy.

Hey People. You’re Welcome Back. You know the letterDear Future Husband I wrote to My future Husband eh? Well….I got a few responses from jonzing future husbands. I selected just 2 to show you guys. One from Famzing naija dog and the other; an anonymous jonzer.

Today, I bring you Famzing Naija Dog….
*******
Good Morning. @OluwaWanaBaba here. If you know me, Sup? If you don’t, go and buy bread at http://playbookutunu.wordpress.com and come back. Kemi dearie, thanks for the advert space. Moving on.

In case, you do not know by now (some people are actually slower than the cross-breed of a snail and a tortoise), Kemi is my future wife. I saw her letter, and as a good future husband decided to reply.
Happy reading.

“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy. If you get a bad wife, you’ll become a philosopher.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Wana’s room,
Fabulous Mansion,

Mars.
Kemi’s Room,
Awesome Grace Villa,
Venus.
Kemi. Pardon me for calling you by your name straight, and not using all the sweet names like “honeypie” and “sugarpoop”. You know you are the Queen of my Heart, the only boxers in my cupboard, the only Oracle in my Twitter. But that doesn’t mean I will call you names like “honeypie”. Life is too short for Iranu. The highest I can call you is ‘dear’, and that will be when I’m in a good mood, like after I’ve eaten 7 wraps of Amala.
I got your letter last night. I have to say, I was impressed with what I read. You really are a smart, beautiful girl, and I’m proud to be your future husband.
I was not chyking any girl o! I was having practicals on the mammary glands with a female classmate when your letter came in. I want to be a doctor. To hell with the National Cake. Let us not soil our hands with something so evil. I have a desire to save lives which is why I want to be a doctor, and earn more than enough money for us to be comfortable.
I have read your rules, and I am not entirely happy with them. To prevent future throwing of fists, let me send you a revised edition of your rules that suit us both.

1. I totally agree with rule number 1. We shall obey God everywhere. Every time. In every different way. I doubt you’ll be able to obey God as vigorously as I can, so I’ll need ‘prayer partners’. They will be Nkechi, my secretary and our 3 maids.

2. 8 children? Sextuplets? Then twins? Do you have a death wish? This, I do not agree with. Unless you’ve found a way to develop 2 extra pairs of breasts, that’s a No. We’re having a maximum of 4 children, and that’s it. Imagine if the 8 children inherit my troublesome behavior? You’ll just end up booking a permanent reservation at 8, Harvey Road, Yaba.
I will never ever change diapers. No matter what you’re doing, once the baby cries, attend to it. I may help make food once in an extremely dark blue moon, but that’s all the help you’ll get from me. You and the other maids can do the rest.

3. Cooking is not an issue. I’m a good cook. A very wonderful cook sef. If you see me prepare Bread and Butter, you would be amazed. I am also an expert in making Boiled Eggs, so no need to worry. Hunger will never finish our children.

4. I know they have their disadvantages, but we have to house-helps. Plenty of them. I don’t want you to work yourself to death, as washing 7 Maybach-Benzes and 3 Rolls-Royce Phantoms every morning will kill you. Trust me. Na ordinary Toyota Camry I dey wash for here every morning wey my Humerus don almost commot my Gleno-Humeral joint.
We will have 3 hired helps, and their names shall be Ekaette, Enobong and Iniobong. They shall each have their own rooms and their payment and every other situation related to their welfare shall be handled by me.

5. I’m totally with you on Date Nights. It’s a chance to show you off to the world and make all the other men jealous of the gorgeous beauty on my arm, so yes I’m with it.
Our actual first date? It’s gonna be wonderful. It’s gonna be fantastic… There’s this new Cholera Joint opposite my crib… Their Bread & Beans is orgasmically delicious…

6. Yeah, I’ve wondered how the proposal is gonna be… I’m so romantic and I have so many ideas in mind… Lemme give you one example…
Me: Kemi, where are you?
You: In the toilet!
Me: Is your shit hard?
You: *grunts* Uuuuurrggghh
Me: Will you marry me?
You: Uuurrrrggghhhh!!!
Me: *pops champagne*
Wasn’t that so romantic?

7. I like the idea that we should have our own song. That one song that would set us in the mood and make us remember why we fell in love in the first place. There are a lot of songs running through my mind right now…
What do you think of “Dadubule” by Scally? The lyrics are so emotional and filled with love, and they make me so happy when I hear them…
“Meji l’oyan, okan l’oko… Meji l’epon, okan l’oko…”
“Abi iwo bricklayer one time to lon r’ebo r’ebo…”
“Baby je ki n bi sinu obo”
*sighs* So romantic…
Another romantic song on my mind is M.I.’s Somebody Wants To Die… The title alone reeks of love…

8. Discipline: I too, am not in favour of beating children. It’s a very barbaric and destructive practice, and I’m in favor of more constructive punishments.
‘Stand in the corner’ is not a punishment. When I say punishments, I mean punishments like ‘The Transporter’. Let me explain it to you.
We put a 50L drum full of water at the front gate, and an empty one in the back-yard. The child to be punished is then handed a fork, with which he must transfer the water from the drum with water to the empty one.
Trust me, Spending 19 hours walking in a straight line without food or water or any break will cure every bad habit in that child.
I really admire that you took your time to write that lovely letter to me. I have exchanged it for N30 akara, which I ate with Ijebu garri and groundnut, so that it may be forever etched in my memory…
Till we meet,
Yours lovingly,
Wana.
******
I Def won’t marry a Doctor.
Wana you’re jonzing 😀

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

“Since long time i never write new post..Since long time I never write new post. Many of you go dey wonder why your geh never write new post! I just dey looku and laffu..I just dey looku and laafu!! I dey look and laff! I dey look and laff!!”

                                                                                                                                                 -Merix of Fela’s  I Laugh’

Don’t let me deceive you…Apart from looking and laughing, No inspiration! Plus laziness!! Plus I‘ve been so busy!! You know na? Med school (Exams and shyt) Plus Dadddy’s birthday Plus silly guests 😦 and all!! So pretty busy.

Since the event of Med Diary (4), My wordpress mentor <_< Warned me not  to post anything If I have nothing to post about. He also warned me about too many guest writers; People want to see me write. To be factual, I really don’t know how to write about anything apart from my journals and people seem to respond well to my Journals and Med Diaries. So I guess I’ll stick to those. It’s my blog right? The baba is strict sef! When I wanted to use exam as an excuse for my laziness, The baba did not gree o! He said I have to be committed!! *God Help Me* I love him tho!! I’m sure you want to know who he is…Aproko will not kee you!!

People have been bugging me for a new Med Diary. But my life is not that interesting na?? This is not even a Med Diary. Hello?? 4.5?? Its just me apologising for Med Diary (4).

PAUZEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

As I was trying to type this ish! I noticed somethingOn my Time_ine #withanl….Subs were flying all over the place and I was like this should be interesting..what has happened again?? Before I could say AH! PHCN did the deed!! I was sad!! They sure know how to make somebody carry last. But never will I carry last  in that kind of thing. GOD FORBID

Without wasting time, I found my C1-01 Launched my Opera Mini Brower and searched for #withanL…Just so I could be in the know. rather than asking stupid questions like a last carrier that I am. So I got the inside scoop.

If you’re here to know what happened, or you are looking for some kind of controversy or for a funny story,  I’m sorry but you are in the wrong place *sweeps you away with ugwu leaves*

The only thing I learnt from this is that you should not put your private life out there. Whatever happens in your private life should stay there. You should learn from it too.

Even though I blog about my personal life, I try as much as possible to keep my ‘private’ life out of it.

Its really amazing how the Citizens of Twitville are so interested in Blogsville now because of the recent Brouhahas! It has been fun tho! Starting from the Twitter Celebs to the Virgin Boy… They obviously left the people wanting more. I found this on my Timeline.

The people of Twitville are actually enjoying these Uprisings.

In case you missed the Blogsville drama, I aint giving out no links :p I have been too nice to ye last carriers!! Do your own homework!! If you want the links tho say it and you will pay :D..Hehe! Blogsville is the shinzit!!

I don’t have much to say about the Celeb post but I really had fun going through the comments!! Almost 1000 comments!! Who does this?? GothPrince why you noo come write for me? Some people built houses there..People advertising shoes and all..Im sure you would have made a fortune selling Gala and La Casera in there. It was some really serious ish!! Some other people were just joking around and the Voltrons and Victims (people that did not get follow backs) doing their thing.

I noticed that the people of twitville are’nt really interested in blogville unless a post has something about twitter in it. i know this because my two posts Anatomy of a Twitfight and #NIGERIANTWITTER are my most viewed posts till date. But in recent times, they seem to be everywhere. Waiting for a controversy.

Did you read The Encore to that Celeb post? I was with Goth Prince on that one. The points he gave for why twitter is serious were so on point and I loved it.

Should I still title this Med Diary 4.5?? O well.

Moving on..*changes gear*

The Virgin Boy…People pretty much missed his point. I felt his point was that You can be a virgin and still be cool. Taking him for example. People just turned the simple message upside down. They must sha see the flip side of everything !*sigh* Some people were even like why should he tell us that he is a virgin?? OK. He can’t tell us that he is a virgin but its okay to write about your sexcapades?? it is well. In another light, It’s his blog, It’s his life so why do you even care? If you dictate what you want him to write, It’s no longer his blog.

Blog: an online diary. So you can do whatever you like with your blog and there are different types of blogs out there…From the blogs with serious Life lessons, To the Sex  blogs, To the Funny as hell, To the Relationship blogs, To the down right Crazy, The Poets, The inspirational ones, The religious ones, The political ones (citation needed), The techies, The Sport blogs, Those storytellers and so much more….Hehe, There is now a Dear Auntie  Kemi section on The Great Tula’s blog sef.

Im beginning to rant.

I thi….That Reminds me!!! This recent trend of nude avatars!! Why evils?? Do you need followers that much?? I think there are better ways of getting followers than showing the whole world your nakedness. A boobvatar can suffice. Testimonies anyone?? Or be smart. Tweet wise things, Or you can even buy followers I know they do this. Nakedness is not the way o!! Think of the future.  Your bride price is reducing..minus 50kobo per hour.

As for me o!! Im trying my possible best not to do anything that will hinder me from becoming WHO president…Be yimuing there o!! Instead of you to famz now…You might want a job in the UN building then..you will now run to me. OK!

Ok. I'll stop here.I promise not to bore you much, and fewer guest writers. 
Thanks for taking your time out to read this till the end. 
 REMEMBER! all your private affairs should stay outta the public eye.

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Sorry for the length. I just had to.

PS: I did not go through the stress of putting up all those links for nothing o! ehen!!

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Photo Credit: @HeartBreakKeed



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  • Cecila: When shopping from the internet, a numerate of the great unwashed ofttimes take time to scan done a twosome of reviews on the merchandise ahead qual
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